The Way to Follow a Guru

Hard enough to know how to choose a Guru,
Not to mention being turned off by a sour one.
Be truthful to Bodhicitta and practice solidly,
Approach gradually with eyes open, and dedicate oneself to the Dharma!   from Yutang Lin

FATE.....

There was a scholar who was to marry his fiancee, but on the day of marriage, his fiancee changed her mind and married someone else. The scholar was devastated and fell ill. His family seek all kinds of medical treatment for him, but still he showed no sign of recovery. They were
about to give up hope on him when a wandering monk passed by. After learning about the scholar's condition, the monk walked to the scholar's bed and took out a mirror for the dying man to see.

In the mirror, the scholar saw a vast ocean, and the naked body of a murdered woman lay on the beach. A man passed by, looked at the body, shook his head and left. Another man who passed by saw the body, took off his robes to cover the body and left.

Finally came a man passing by who saw the body, dug a hole and laid the body carefully to rest before burying it. The scene in the mirror suddenly changed. The scholar saw his fiancee in a nuptial chamber and another man was lifting her wedding veil... The scholar blinked at the monk,
confused. Slowly the monk explained,

"The woman whose body you saw on the beach was your fiancee in her previous life. In your previous life, you were the second man who gave her his robes to cover her body. To repay your kindness in this lifetime, she loved you for a period of time and became your fiancee. However, ultimately the man whose favor she has to return for the rest of her life is the third man who
buried her. And that man is now her husband."

Enlightened, the scholar sat up and recovered from his dispression. It is truly amazing -- this thing called "Fate". There was a movie in which the theme song went like this: "You can say it is a big world, you can say it is a small world. But for the promise of this lifetime, we shall spend our entire lives to fulfil."

All of us are in this big grand masquerade, among the throng of people, we seek expectantly... in that electrifying moment when our fingers touch, the masks are removed to reveal our true selves. Before this moment, we were drifting aimlessly, not knowing what we really wanted. Till you meet this particular person, you finally realize what you really want is not what you have wished for in the first place. It amazes you that standing in front of this person is a different you! You without any mask!

Fate is not something meant to be forced upon. What is yours Will eventually come to your arms; what is not yours will never come to be. In any case, we should not lose heart and give up on our hopes for love that is true, good and beautiful. The value of life, in a certain sense, is
determined by the maturity of how we love. Of how we give and accept love.

Treasure what you have...
                     Time is too slow for those who wait;
                     Too swift for those who fear;
                     Too long for those who grief;
                     Too short for those who rejoice;
                     But for those who love...
                     Time is Eternity!

Fifth Lay Precept: not to use intoxicants.

Keeping the Precepts

Once upon a time a Buddhist lama was traveling in the steppe as a "badarch," a holy man that brings blessings to the nomad families in exchange for food and lodging. It was close to sunset, and he came upon a lone ger [yurt] and some livestock. 

As he approached the ger, a young woman came out to greet him. She was the only person living there. 

He requested hospitality and she agreed, but said he could stay the night only under one condition. He had to choose to do one of three things. He could drink alcohol, sleep with her, or sacrifice a goat. 

Now the last was taboo for lamas since only shamans sacrifice goats. Since all three choices were in some degree sinful, he had a difficult decision. He decided that drinking alcohol would be the least harmful. 

He drank the alcohol, and while he was drunk, fed up with its bleating, he killed the goat.  When he woke up the next morning,  he found himself in bed with his hostess. 

He then learned that drinking alcohol is a small sin but it can easily make a man do bad things under its influence.

The Worm

There is a wonderful little story about two monks who lived together in a monastery for many years; they were great friends.

Then they died within a few months of one another. One of them got reborn in the heaven realms, the other monk got reborn as a worm in a dung pile. The one up in the heaven realms was having a wonderful time, enjoying all the heavenly pleasures.

But he started thinking about his friend,

"I wonder where my old mate has gone?" So he scanned all of the heaven realms, but could not find a trace of his friend. Then he scanned the realm of human beings, but he could not see any trace of his friend there, so he looked in the realm of animals and then of insects. Finally he found him, reborn as a worm in a dung pile... Wow!

He thought: "I am going to help my friend. I am going to go down there to that dung pile and take him up to the heavenly realm so he too can enjoy the heavenly pleasures and bliss of living in these wonderful realms."

So he went down to the dung pile and called his mate. And the little worm wriggled out and said:

"Who are you?",

"I am your friend. We used to be monks together in a past life, and I have come up to take you to the heaven realms where life is wonderful and blissful."

But the worm said: "Go away, get lost!" "But I am your friend, and I live in the heaven realms," and he described the heaven realms to him.

But the worm said: "No thank you, I am quite happy here in my dung pile. Please go away."

Then the heavenly being thought: "Well if I could only just grab hold of him and take him up to the heaven realms, he could see for himself." So he grabbed hold of the worm and started tugging at him; and the harder he tugged, the harder that worm clung to his pile of dung.

Do you get the moral of the story? How many of us are attached to our pile of dung?

fertilityfriend.com

If an egg was fertilized, implantation (when the embryo implants to the lining of her uterus) happens, on average, about 7 days past ovulation.

 

It can happen as early as five days past ovulation or as late as twelve days past ovulation.

 

Now is in the phase of cycle where implantation may occur. Although implantation may be visible on her chart (triphasic pattern, dip and/or spotting) it is not always visible even on pregnancy charts. This is the most stressful waiting phase. It is generally too early to test.

 

 

2 days has gone

Since yesterday, I re-start my diet plan again. Below is the my menu.

 

Breakfast is a cup of milk tea with 1 bread that is near my office.

 

Lunch .... guess what. From a full bowl of chicken rice reduce to a small plate of Luo-Mai-Kei + milk tea.

 

Dinner ? ?  Slight smaller than normal meal.

 

Of course all meal come with heavy intake of nicotine which we call it "Cow-Boy" blue color, cost me $9.60 in a normal coffee shop.

 

Hope that when I report back for my ICT can reduce the weight to 64 kg again. I dun wan to be called by anyone  . . "Fatty".

 

Wish me good luck.

 

 

The Heart Sutra

The Heart Sutra

(The Prajna-Paramita-Hrdaya Sutra)

 

When Bodhisattva Avalokitesvara practices the profound Prajna-paramita, he intuitively realizes that the five aggregates (skandhas) are of Sunyata nature thus securing his deliverance from all distress and sufferings.

Sariputra! Form (rupa) does not differ from Sunyata, nor Sunyata from form. Form is identical with Sunyata (and) Sunyata is identical with form. So also are reception (vedana), conception (sanjna), mental conduct (samskara) and consciousness (vijnana) in relation to Sunyata.

Sariputra, the Sunyata nature of all things is neither created nor annihilated; neither impure nor pure; and neither increasing nor decreasing.

Therefore, in Sunyata, there is neither form (rupa), reception (vedana), conception (sanjna), mental conduct (samskara), nor consciousness (vijnana); there is neither eye, ear, nose, tongue, body nor mind; there is neither form, sound, odor, flavor, feeling nor idea; there are no such things as the eighteen realms of sense (dhatus) from the realm of sight up to that of the faculty of mind (vijnana); there are no such things as the twelve links in the chain of existence (nidanas) from ignorance (avidya) with also the end of ignorance up to old age and death (jaramarana) with also the end of old age and death; there are no (such things as) the four noble truths and there is neither Wisdom nor obtainment.

Because of no obtainment, Bodhisattvas who rely on Prajna-paramita, have no hindrance in their minds, and since they have no hindrance, they have no fear, are free from perversive and delusive ideas and attain the Ultimate Nirvana.

All Buddhas of the past, present and future attain the Full Enlightenment (anuttara-samyak-sambodhi) by relying on Prajna-paramita. So we know that Prajna-paramita is the great supernatural Mantra, the great bright, unsurpassed and unequalled Mantra which can truly and without fail wipe out all sufferings.

Therefore, He uttered the Prajna-paramita mantra which reads:

Gate, Gate, Paragate, Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha!

NKF petition

I had signed, how abt you ?

http://www.petitiononline.com/nkfs/petition.html

Batam Island

Batam Island, located just 20 kilometers southeast of Singapore, with area around two-third the size of Singapore is one of the largest islands in Indonesia's Riau Archipelago.

 

If I take a ferry from Singapore Harbourfront center. It will only take me 1 hours and 15mins to reach the ferry point at Batam Island which is known as "Batam Center".

 

We are planning to go back this weekend (16/17 July). But I pull back and think about it. . . reason ? I duno why.

 

Maybe I still feel unsafe to leave my youngest brother at home alone over the weekend. Who know whether he will bring his gal friend to stay over night or not ? or some unknown visitors.

 

Sigh ~ ~  At the same time, if go back to Batam ... what can I do ? Massage again ? Shopping ? Eating ?  hmmmmh...... I wonder which hotel should I stay again this round.

 

 

Do you know why are you working so hard ?

On the very first day of the world, God created the cow.

He said to the cow: "Ah Gu (cow), today I have created you. Your job is to go to the field with the farmer all day long. You will provide the energy to pull things. You will also provide milk for people to drink. You are to work all day under the sun. In return, you will only eat grass. For that, you will have a life span of 50 years."

Ah Gu objected.

"What, I work all day in the sun and I get only to eat grass? On top of that, I have to give my milk away? This is tough and you want me to live 50 years? I'll take 20 and you can have the remaining 30 years back."

God agreed.

On the next day, God created the dog. He said to the dog: "Ah Kow (dog), I have created you for a purpose. You are to sit all day by the door of your master's house.
Should anyone come in, you are to bark at them. In return, you will eat your master's leftovers. I'll give you a life span of 20 years."

Ah Kow objected.

" What, I have to sit by the door all day and will need to bark at people, and what do I get? Leftovers. This isn't right, I'll take 10 and you can have the remaining 10 years back."

God agreed again.

On the third day, God created the monkey. He said to the monkey: "Lao Kao (monkey), your job is to entertain people. You will make them laugh, act stupid and make faces. You will also do somersaults and swing on trees to amaze them.
In return, you will get to eat bananas and peanuts. For that, I'll give you 20 years to live."

Naturally the monkey objected.

"This is ridiculous, I gotta make faces and make people laugh? Let's not even come to the part about the trees and somersaults. Tell you what, I'll give 10 years of my life to thank you for my existence and I'll take 10. What do you think?"

God agreed again.

On the forth day, God created humans. God said to the man: "You are my best piece of work, for that, you will only need to sleep, eat, sleep, play, eat, sleep again and do nothing else. You will get to eat all the best things and play with the best toys. All you need to do is enjoy all your life. For this kind of life, I'll give you 20 years."

Just like the rest, the man objected.

"What, all I need to do is relax and enjoy myself and I have only 20 years to live?
Tell you what, you've 30 years back from Ah Gu, 10 years from Ah Kow and another 10 from Lao Kao and you probably don't know what to do with all those lives. Why not I take them all and I'll have 70 years to live?"

God being such good natured, agreed with a smile.

And that is why:

We eat, sleep, play and enjoy for the first 20 years of our lives when we are growing up. Work like a cow for the next 30 to raise our family. Sit outside the door and bark at people for the next 10 when we are retired. And finally, we make faces and perform monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren for the final 10 years.

Getting better ? I think so . .

I'm not pissed off at him for moving in. I just dun like this type of arrangement where I dun have a choice to say "No!" to him. People will say that I'm not compassionate enough. I will feel guilt as well for if he doesn't have a place to sleep. Overall, I'm not the mastermind and I dun have a word since he is so money minded.

 

I dun like this feeling.

 

Money is important to lots of human being, With money, u can do a lot, without money, you can't do a lot. BUT MONEY IS NOT EVERYTHING.

 

Some time I wonder how a woman think ? A woman here is refer to someone who never went out to work, get cheated by some auntie from wet market, spent lots of $ on un-necessary items and yet no lesson has been learnt.

 

I really shock when I heard she spent about 100K for just 2 year or so ... average $6k a month for household expense .. that is more like shopping rather than just eating.

 

I being to believe that die is an relief from this earth, now I know why my dad want to die (he always say that), but we can't bear to let him go, we love him so much... he is still young ... not even carry a grandson yet.

 

How I wish to fulfill his wish as well.

 

 

Should I ?

Should I really move / upgrade to a bigger HDB flat ?  I'm staying in a 3 room HDB flat (2 small bedroom only).

 

Me and my dear are sleeping in the master bedroom, and the other room is been used for study and my work place. Out of sudden ... there is a person move in and stay with us without notifications.

 

A House to me is a very personal space that I can put myself at ease. So that I can dress down, relax, do anything I want. But out of sudden have someone move in ... It really makes me very uncomfortable and have to put myself very alert at home again.

 

Even I want to talk louder or wear lesser at home also cannot.

 

I very piss off.

Tired

I'm tired, very tired. Not only physically is tired, but also mentally and spiritually.

 

I duno how to put into english words for people to understand, cause I'm will just write what come across my mind now.

 

I want to let go of it, let go of the burden and things that is on my shoulder. Some how, I prefer to be alone with my wife only that no one can disturb our quiet world. But at the same time, I cannot just dun care of others unhappiness, worry and wants to give them a hand. But yet I scare of involving myself too much that cause hurt on me.

 

There is no one to blame except myself. So I dun blame. .. ..

 

I told my darling, if one of the this dates when I'm so ill, pleaseeeeeeee... dun cry, let me go in peace, smile at last night and celebrate for me please.

 

I want to sleep, I'm sleepy and too tired. . .

Nonya Ba Chang

I love Nonya Ba Chang from this company which their URL is http://www.kimchoo.com.sg

 

Why ? Because I can smell the faint, fragrant scent of the pandan leaves before I sink my teeth in it. The filling is made up of finely chopped lean meat (oh.. pls. . it is lean meat .. not the fat meat) that tastes like meat floss in my mouth.

 

Thanks to my Executive Director for buying all of us this Nonya Ba Chang from KimChoo.

 

:)

 

Btw, this is my dinner for tonight.

 

 

 

 

perspective

perspective

A new blogger has just join us ... let welcome my brudder "Agawads".

Do you know your character

Drop me a comment about your DOB and I can tell your character

 

Just the Month and the Date will do, the report will be in Chinese Character.

 

:)

 

 

Are you drinking the right tea?

Are you drinking the right tea?

1. People who use their "brain" to work or students who study hard day
and night --- should drink more chrysanthemum Tea.

2. People who need a lot of body energy to work or those people that do
a lot of exercise everyday --- should drink Wu Loong Tea.

3. People who travel on a bike or work in dirty and polluted places ---
should drink Green Tea.

4. For people who likes to sit down all day long and not doing anything
even exercising --- must drink Green Tea and Flower Tea.

5. People who smoke and drink alot of alcoholic drinks --- should drink
more Green Tea.

6. People who must eat meat at least once a day, or feel sick or not
feeling well --- try to drink some Wu Loong Tea.

7. People who go to the washroom too often or too less --- should drink
more Honey Tea

8. People with high cholesterol and high blood pressure --- Wu Loong
Tea,Green Tea.

9. Those who work with computers everyday --- need to drink a lot of Tea
(any tea wil do).

Whenever you are working with the computer, you should make some tea,
drink it when you are free. Drinking Tea is healthy, it can protect and
prevent the harmful Ultraviolet light from harming us (when using
computer). Furthermore, it can also cure us when we are tired and help
making our body feel fresh again.

some tips on cheaper Feng Shui - Part 6-11

6) Cheaper ways to enhance career:

a) Hang picture of mountain behind where you sit at work. If you can't afford to buy the painting, get it from internet or draw it yourself (mountain picture is not too difficult to draw).
b) 8 pa kua aspirations- activate N to enhance career. If you can't afford aquarium, hang picture of fishes or waterfall at the area. Again, the picture can be downloaded from the internet.
c) If you can't afford to buy brass dragon tortoise and place it at north, you can opt for the resin one.

7) Cheaper ways to enhance relationship:

a) Flying star- always choose a bedroom with good mountain star, preferably mountain star 8.
b) Place crystal/boulder at mountain star 8- if you can't afford to buy crystal or jade/diamond boulder, use rocks instead. (Rocks can be collected free from seaside..etc).
c) Or hang a picture of mountain at mountain star 8- (draw the picture of your own or get it from internet if you can't afford to buy the picture). 

8) Cheaper ways to enhance study luck/inspirations:

a) Sit facing and sleep with head pointing to growth/Fu wei direction.
b) If you can't afford to buy crystal globe and place it at study table, you can buy 7 level pagoda made of clay or porceline. Cheaper than crystal globe.

9) Cheaper ways to enhance fame:

a) Activate South area- If you can't afford to buy a lamp and light up the area, use candle lights instead.
b) If you can't afford to buy horse figurine, you can use picture of phoenix and place it south. The picture can get from internet or scan from book.

10) Cheaper ways to enhance happiness:

a) Speak, think, do, and hear no evil.
b) Helping people (it can be in a form of small donations or helping people with problems).
c) Filiel Piety
d) Practice virtues.

11) Cheaper ways to enhance good chi:

a) Make sure that the the chi meanders and not moving in a straight line. If you have doors in straight lines, block the middle with a board.
b) Space clearing- if you can't afford to buy the singing bowl/bell, burn incense instead.

Practice feng shui does not mean we need to spend a lot of money on it. It is up to our own wisdom and creativity to make our feng shui not only effective but cost-saving as well. 

some tips on cheaper Feng Shui - Part 1-5

1) Feng shui that does not cause a single cent at all:

a) Clearing clutter- helps to refresh the chi in the house.
b) Sit facing and sleep with head pointing to your auspicious directions.
c) Do not sit/sleep under toilet/bathroom.
d) Do not sleep with feet pointing towards door.
e) Do not share a wall with toilet/bathroom when sleeping.
f) Always sit/sleep with solid wall/background.
g) Do not sit with door at the back.
h) Use an auspicious door for entrance (ex: If your house have two entrances, choose one that is better accoridng to kua number. (west group people should use west-group doors (W,NW,NE,SW) while East group people should use east group door (E,SE,S,N).
i) Do not eat too near the main entrance (wealth tend to seep away)
j) Remove mirrors from bedroom
k) Do not place auspicious objects, water, books, food under staircase.
l) Place stove with its mouth facing auspicious direction
m) Do not place water beside or directly opposite the stove.
n) Do not place fridge beside or directly opposite the stove.
o) Place tv set/stereo at W/NW sector
p) Do not sit/sleep under overheadbeam
q) Wish list- write down your wish on a paper, sign it 49 times each day and burn it (do it for 49 days)
r) Change your signature into auspicious signature (begin with upstroke and end with upstroke).
s) Not enough money to buy feng shui books? Spend some time and read it at bookstore instead (but I personally prefer to have a few collections such as flying star and four pillars for reference).

2) To overcome annual afflictions:

a) 5 yellow- if you can't afford to buy 6 rod hollow metal windchime, use 6 I-ching coins tied with red/gold ribbon instead to hang it at 5 yellow area. I-ching coins are cheaper than windchime.

b) Three killings- If you can't afford to buy 3 Chi Lins to combat the three killings, just make sure that you do not sit with three killings at your back.

c) Grand duke jupiter- If you can't afford to buy the brass Pi yao to appease the grand duke, buy the one made with resin instead. If you really do not have money, just make sure that you do not sit facing the grand duke jupiter (Tai Sui).

3) Cheaper ways to enhance wealth:

a) Sit facing and sleep with head pointing to sheng chi direction
b) Place three I-ching coins tied with ribbon and place it in wallet/purse.
c) Flying star - place water feature at water star 8. If you can't affor to have the rotating crystal ball or aquarium, hang painting of fishes instead. You don't have to buy the painting, browse into internet, print it out and enlarge it. It is much more cheaper than buying oil-painting. But if really do not have money, place moving objects such as electrical fan at water star 8.
d) 8 pa kua aspirations- Place plants at SE to enhance wealth. If you can't afford to buy plants, get it from roadside (hehe..just joking, not auspicious to steal), you can grow the plants instead. Buying seeds is cheaper than buying grown plants.

4) Cheaper ways to enhance health:

a) Sit facing and sleep with head pointing to health/Tien Yi direction.
b) If you can't afford to buy big wu lou, buy a small one instead, wear or carry it along wherever you go.
c) 8 pa kua aspirations- Plants at E to enhance health. Again, if you can't afford to buy plants, grow your own plants instead.

5) Cheaper ways to enhance love:

a) Sit facing and sleep with head pointing to nien yen/love direction.

b) Activate SW corner- If you can't afford to buy lamp, use candle lights instead to light up the area.

c) Mandarin ducks at SW- If you can't afford to buy the crystal made mandarin ducks, buy the wooden one.

d) Paint SW with red/pink- If you can't afford to buy paint, use red/pink cloth instead. Cover the table with red/pink cloth and put it at SW area. You can also place the mandarin ducks on top of it.

Essential Tools For Marriage That Works

Marriage is a lifelong process of living with your partner and enriching your relationship with each other.  It is expected that marriage will have its ups and downs.

 

An understanding of marital responsibilities is a key ingredient to a successful marriage.  To develop a meaningful marital relationship, couples need to know themselves, their partners and learn to grow together.

• Communication - Effective communication reinforces a marital relationship.  We need to express our thoughts and feelings as much as we want attention and responses. So we can't shutup all the time and keep quiet.
• Family Relationship - With the rapid changes in the modern world, we should clarify what we expect from each other and develop a style of working together. And do remember the promise that make, doesn't mean after a year or so, you can forgotten about it.
• Financial Management - How we handle money revels the kind of lifestyle we aspire to attain and the values we hold.  Each of us are likely to have individual differences in the way we handle our $. Having a combined saving account and come to a common agreement level is important. Because money could be the cause of divorce.
• Relationship Development - To develop a meaningful relationship as a married couple, we need to know ourself as well as our partner in order for the both of us to learn to grow together.
• Sex in Marriage - Sexual intimacy is more than physical closeness; it  is an emotional adventure, an exploration, and a process of discovery.  A secure marital relationship helps us to learn about each other sexually. Dun give excuse just becuase we work too tired in office or "I prefer in the morning...not night" and you need to off the house before 7 am.

So do you know why I copy this paragraph from some website ?